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America's merry maid

Here is the new maid that America needs, to run around our back country and city streets picking up all the garbage american's are throwing out their car windows. She is sweet, and smiles all the time. Working at a pace of a 10X10 room every two hours, this little merry maid should be finished with the United States in 400 years.

Finally the "soma" you have all been waiting for

If anyone is offended by what I say, there is many new drugs (thanks to our drug companies) that can help tune out truth. Yes it is true! Finally a pill that allows you to stop thinking when someone is telling you like it is. It comes in a very paletable little pink tablet, and tastes like bubblegum. From now on, when the news is on and they are telling you how many people died today in Iraq, you can run to your medicine cabinet, pop our new pill, and wham-o the no think tank has been turned on. No more feeling sorry for people, no more getting irritated when someone suggests something that might apply to you. Nope, cause you don't have to listen anymore. In fact, you wont listen at all with this new wonderful invention.

Teenagers in Mercedes Benz

If you were at a lost as what to buy your deserving graduating student for graduation gift, then you haven't thought of a new Mercedes Benz. What other way to say "hey, all I got for graduation was a damn card, but you, you deserve the best". Teenagers these days, they deserve nothing but the best. They have become very talented at spending mommy and daddy's money, and deserve to continue to have all the finer things in life that we never had. Front and side impact air bags, in case they are out late partying at a club when they are supposed to be studying at that ivy league school your paying for. Safety first! Nothing says "I love you, but never paid two licks of attention to you for 18 years" better than a $60,000-$80,000 vehicle.

My husband swears that someday soon the financial dividers will ease there marks for middle to lower class people. For those people who have always dreamed of having a baby, but who could only dream of affording it, will soon have another option. Walmart who offers us middle to lower class citizens, a way to pay from anything from laundry soap to online music, will soon offer a low cost baby adoption market. Any child from China to California, walmart will offer the lowest prices to owning a child of your very own. Yes if it has been your dream of owning a child from Nigeria, walmart can make it come true! Please, Please however, keep your receipt to ensure money back in case of malfunction or misgifting. ( don't ya just hate it when you ask for a small black child, and get a large oriental one). Great for fathers day!! Check it out at www.suckingthelifeoutofpeopleforyears.walmart.com

Only Barbie can drive this thing

Driving yesterday, I was at a stop light and heard some obnoxious blonde through the window of her car on her cell phone. I look over at her with my "what the hell is wrong with you" look on my face, to see that she is a 100 lb blonde driving a new white hummer. WOW! I don't think she has any military back ground to be driving this thing. I feel sorry for the poor fool she parks too close to at the mall. I think she had too much tanning lotion on, and it was clouding her thinking, to buy a vehicle like this. I guess only Malibu barbie is equiped to drive this beast!

Albanians embrace Bush???

The albanians embrace George Bush when he recently visited their country recently. Some people waited all day to just catch a glimpse of him. Hum....... The albanians saw this visit from the president, as a reward for their support of anti terrorism. Hum...... Well this guy did a hell of a job bull-dozing this country, if only he could convince his own.....